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Remember: You don’t deserveto be hit or threatened!
During An Explosive Incident
Argue Only in A Safe Place If an argument seems unavoidable, try to have it in a room or area that has access to an exit, and not in the bathroom, kitchen, or anywhere near weapons.
Practice Your Exit.Practice how to get out of your home safely. Identify which doors, windows, elevator, or stairwell would be best.
Prepare a Bag. Have a packed bag ready and keep it in an undisclosed but accessible place in order to leave quickly.
Alert A Neighbor. Identify a neighbor you can tell about the violence and ask that he/she call law enforcement if he/she hears a disturbance coming from your home.
Share A Code Word. Devise a code word or signal to use with your children, family, friends, and neighbors when you need law enforcement.
Plan Your Lodging.Decide and plan where you will go if you have to leave home (even if you don’t think you will need to). Call crisis line if you need help.
Trust Your Instincts.Use your own instincts and judgment. If the situation is very dangerous, consider giving the abuser what he wants to calm him down. You have the right to protect yourself until you are out of danger.
Preparing to Leave
Set Up Your Own Account. Open a savings account in your own name to start to establish or increase your independence (have statements mailed to a trusted friend). Think of other ways in which you can increase your independence.
Store Some Necessities. Leave money, an extra set of keys, copies of important documents (including photos of injuries, medical bills, and other evidence) and extra clothes with someone you trust so you can leave quickly.
Seek Friends’ Help. Determine who would be able to let you stay with them or lend you some money.
Be Ready to Call. Keep the shelter phone number close at hand and keep some change or a calling card on you at all times for emergency phone calls.
Memorize Your Plan. Review your safety plan as often as possible in order to plan the safest way to leave your batterer.
Checklist.
Things you need to take when you leave:
Identification
Medical records for all family members
Driver’s license
Birth certificates (yours and your children’s)
Social Security card
Welfare identification
Money
School records
Rental Agreement, lease, house deed
Work permits
Green card
Bank books
Passport
Checkbooks
Divorce papers
Insurance papers
Jewelry
House and car keys
Children’s small toys
Medications
Address book
Small saleable objects
Pictures (including photos of any injuries)
Safety In Your Own Home
Change Your Locks. Change the locks on your doors as soon as possible. Install additional locks and safety devices for your windows.
Plan With Your Children.Discuss a safety plan with your children.
Inform Caregivers. Inform your children’s school, day care, etc. about who has permission to pick up your children.
Let Your Neighbors Know. Inform neighbors and landlord that your partner no longer lives with you and that they should call law enforcement if they see him near your home.
Safety At Work & In Public
Get Help. Decide who at work you will inform of your situation. This should include office or building security (provide a picture of your batterer, if possible).
Screen Calls. Arrange to have someone screen your telephone calls, if possible.
When You Leave Work.Devise a safety plan for when you leave work. Have someone escort you to your car, bus, or train. Use a variety of routes to go home, if possible. Think about what you would do if something happened while going home (i.e., in your car, on the bus, etc.)
Safety With a Protective Order
Keep The Order With You. Keep your protective order on your person at all times.
Call the Police or Sheriff. Call law enforcement if your partner breaks the protective order.
Remember: Leaving your batterer may be the most dangerous time.
Stay Safe While Waiting. Think of ways to be safe if law enforcement does not respond right away.
Inform Others. Inform family, friends, and neighbors that you have a protective order in effect.
Safety and Emotional Health
Seek Medical Help. If injured, see a doctor. If urgent, call 911 or go to an emergency room. Keep pictures of your injuries for evidence.
Going Back. If you are thinking of returning to a potentially abusive situation, discuss an alternative plan with someone you trust.
Communicating With Your Partner. If you have to communicate with your partner, determine the safest way to do so.
Read.
Read books, articles, and poems which will help you feel stronger.
Open Up.
Decide whom you can call to talk freely and openly to get the non-judging support you need.
Seek Individual Counseling.
These services can provide support and help you understand more about yourself and the relationship. If necessary, call your local agency for guidance. 
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